Charlotte’s Story

I never imagined how lonely life could feel. When I moved to a small village in West Sussex, it was to give my eldest son, Harrison, a better chance. He has additional needs, and I knew the school he was due to attend wouldn’t support him.

Uprooting our lives felt like a leap into the unknown, but I did it for him. Not long after, I had my second son, Aubrey. Soon after this, my turbulent and abusive relationship with my partner broke down.

What followed was one of the hardest periods of my life. As well as the move, I was dealing with the emotional impact of a difficult separation, while also coping with a new diagnosis of type 1 diabetes and hyperthyroidism.

We were also living in a mould-infested flat and eventually had to be moved out, losing almost everything we owned. I didn’t know anyone in the area. I don’t drive. I was raising two children, one with complex needs, and trying to hold everything together. I couldn’t sleep, my anxiety was overwhelming, and I felt completely alone.

I knew from my experience how damaging isolation can be. When Harrison was young, I tried to manage everything on my own, and I became deeply depressed and withdrawn, and I can see now how that affected him. I promised myself it wouldn’t happen again. With Aubrey, I reached out for help before things got too dark. That’s how I found Home-Start.

At first, I just attended a group, but I found that really difficult, even though everyone was so nice and understanding. My health was so bad, and my anxiety was so severe that some days I could barely get up and out, let alone speak to anyone. I would sit quietly, just trying my hardest to get through it for Aubrey’s sake.

One day, someone noticed I wasn’t okay, and when I finally opened up about everything I’d been through, they asked if I’d like a volunteer. That simple question changed everything.

My Home-Start volunteer Vanessa started visiting me once a week, and she quickly became a lifeline. She never judged me. Instead, she reminded me that I was doing well, and that I was a good mum. That kind of reassurance meant more than I can explain. I had always been made to feel that I was a problem by my ex.

Luckily, I had secured a new home just before Vanessa came along and was due to move soon after. Vanessa asked if she could help me on moving day; it was such a relief because I had no one else. Vanessa helped by staying at my old flat to direct the movers. I felt uncomfortable asking someone I barely knew to take on such a big responsibility, but she handled everything without hesitation. Trust doesn’t come easily to me, but after everything she did that day, I knew she was someone special and felt able to let my guard down.

That evening, Vanessa arrived at my new house with a plant and a card and stayed for a cup of tea, talking through the day with me and making sure I was okay. In the weeks that followed, she helped with practical things like collecting paint for the house, which was invaluable as I don’t drive and was worried about how I would manage everything on my own. Just having someone to share the load with made such a difference, giving me both practical support and emotional reassurance when I needed it most.

Vanessa is amazing. Sometimes I say I wish she were my mum, because she brings that level of warmth and care into our lives. Aubrey absolutely adores her, too. He counts down the days to when he sees her next, and loves showing her the things he’s proud of.

Vanessa and Aubrey get on very well and enjoy playing together. They will play trains and cars or colouring while Vanessa and I chat away.

Later, Home-Start introduced David, another volunteer. David comes to the house to support Harrison and me, as it was noticed that he needed a positive male influence in his life. He’s been incredible. They spend time together, visiting museums and learning about history, something they are both passionate about. It’s given him not only support, but also stability and connection.

Attending the Home-Start group has gotten easier, too. I have made friends, as has Aubrey. We still go to the group now. It is such a supportive and safe environment.

Before Home-Start, I felt completely on my own. Now, I carry a quiet reassurance inside me. I know someone is there. My heart feels full in a way it never has before, and I know the children feel it too. I can see how much happier they both are because I’m happier.

Vanessa shows interest in our life and genuinely cares. She makes me feel secure and happy about the life I now have. We also have visits from Nicola from Home-Start, who is also wonderful, she comes to the house now and again for a catch-up and stays for hours. We chat about lots of different things; I really enjoy our time together too.

All in all, Aubrey is thriving; he has a happier mum, and he’s had the consistency that Harrison never had. Harrison is so much happier too. Home-Start didn’t just help me cope, they helped me believe in myself again. And that has changed absolutely everything.

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